Dear NetZero

Why do you suck so bad?  Two years ago I received multiple welcome kits in the mail – all from fraudulent activity.  Today I received a collection notice from your pathetic Collections Division (that can’t be contacted via phone, despite the toll-free number listed on the top of the page – who was the Einstein who came up with that?)   So I call your billing department (in Bangalore or some other similarly unhelpful location where English is somewhat close to intelligible, but just far enough off that it’s just annoying when you deal with the compression introduced by the echo-cancellation hardware on the phone lines) Lo and behold, my phone number isn’t in your system and I don’t have a clue which maiden name you have on file since Gomer from Sheboygan was the one who set up the fraudulent account.  The unhelpful billing disservice representative tells me I can send a letter to your collections goons and all will be right with the world.  Well, I’m not inclined to do that.  Instead, I think I’ll just post this little diatribe on every venue I can so that the world can see what a pathetic shell of a company you are.  Pass this along to your pretty boy CEO so he can think about this the next time he’s prancing in front of the cameras shooting a television commercial.  Obviously whatever you have in place for “security” during your online subscription process isn’t working.  Pull your heads out, get some oxygen, fix the problems and quit abusing innocent bystanders who get caught between you and your fraudulent customer base.